Books of 2019

1. Lethal Licorice---Amanda Flower
2. Premeditated Peppermint---Amanda Flower
3. City of Ink---Elsa Hart
4. Assaulted Caramel---Amanda Flower
5. Jade Dragon Mountain---Elsa Hart
6. Plainly Murder---Isabella Alan
7. Murder, Plain and Simple---Isabella Alan
8. Plain Murder---Emma Miller
9. The White Mirror--Elsa Hart
10. Plain Killing---Emma Miller
11. Minimum Wage Magic---Rachel Aaron
12. The Governess Affair--Courtney Milan
13. Valley of Dry Bones---J.F. Penn
14. House of Dreams: The Life of L.M. Montgomery--Liz Rosenberg
15. Lady Luck Runs Out---Shannon Esposito
16. The Coroner's Lunch---Colin Cottrell
17. For Pete's Sake---Shannon Esposito
18. The Witches of New York---Ami McKay
19. Thirty-Three Teeth---Colin Cottrell
20. Greensmith Girls---Raven Snow
21. The Hazel Wood---Melissa Albert
22. Love Story---Lauren Layne
23. Midsummer Night's Mischief---Jennifer David Hesse
24. Bell, Book, and Candlemas---Jennifer David Hesse
25. Yuletide Homicide---Jennifer David Hesse
26. Samhain Secrets---Jennifer David Hesse
27. Mayday Murder---Jennifer David Hesse
28. Disco for the Departed---Colin Cotterill
29. Anarchy and Old Dogs---Colin Cotterill
30. Once a Wife---Patricia Keelyn
31. The Bride Price---Mai Neng Moua
32. 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do---Amy Morin
33. Shop till You Drop---Elaine Viets
34. This Will Only Hurt a Little---Busy Philipps
35. Murder Between the Covers---Elaine Viets
36. Someday, Maybe---Lauren Graham
37. Kindred---Octavia E. Butler
38. Criminally Cocoa---Amanda Flower
39. The Night Tiger---Yangsze Choo
40. Bewitched and Betrothed---Juliet Blackwell
41. Wicked Fox---Kat Cho
42. Natalie Tan's Book of Luck and Fortune---Roselle Lim
43. Enchanted, Inc.---Shanna Swendson
44. The Wedding Party--Jasmine Guillory
45. Caught Dead Handed---Carol J. Perry
46. The Overdue Life of Amy Byler---Kelly Harms
47. Casting Spells---Barbara Bretton
48. The Graveyard Book---Neil Gaiman
49. Midnight at the Blackbird Cafe---Heather Webber
50. Curse of the Pogo Stick---Colin Cotterill
51. Bird Box---Josh Malerman
52. The Bookish Life of Nina Hill---Abbi Waxman
53. The Alchemist---Paulo Coelho
54. Spin the Dawn---Elizabeth Lim
55. Prince---Afshin Shahidi
56. The Garden of Small Beginnings, Abbi Waxman
57. Gods of Jade and Snow---Silvia Moreno-Garcia
58. Autumn Alibi---Jennifer David Hesse
59. The Dinner List---Rebecca Serle
60. The Lost Night---Andrea Bartz
61. Tuesday Mooney Talks to Ghosts---Kate Racculia
62. The Plastic Magician---Charlie N. Holmberg
63. Rosie's Travelling Tea Shop---Rebecca Raisin
64. Hexes and Exes---Raven Snow
65. Part-Time Gods---Rachel Aaron
66. If the Shoe Kills---Lynn Cahoon
67. Dressed to Kill---Lynn Cahoon
68. Murder on Wheels---Lynn Cahoon
69. Tea Cups and Carnage---Lynn Cahoon
70. Hospitality and Homicide---Lynn Cahoon
71. Rockets Dead Glare---Lynn Cahoon
72. The Girl with Ghost Eyes---M.H. Boroson
73. The Vine Witch---Luanne G. Smith
74. Grave Destiny---Kalayna Price
75. The Matchmakers of Minnow Bay---Kelly Harms

I read a lot of books in 2019 (at least compared to my previous reading lists). I don't even know if I've listed all of the books that were read in 2019 and if any more comes to my mind, I'll update the list at a later time.

The book that made the most impact on me and one that I'd highly recommend that you read, paul Coelho's The Alchemist. It's a little book, but it's a fantastic book about following your dreams, having faith, and just believing in yourself.

I hope you had a good reading year in 2019. Now, it's time to get cracking with new books for 2020 (it's been a slow start for me so far).

Are there any books you'd recommend based on what you read in 2019?

Follow-Through 2020

Each year, for the last several years, I've chosen a word to guide me through the year, rather than make New Year resolutions. This year, I've chosen the word(s) follow-through/follow through. (When the word is hyphenated, it's a noun and when it's not, it's a verb.) Regardless of how it's spelled, I've decided that 2020 will be the year where I will follow through on all the things that I've started or thought about starting in 2019.

I look back on 2019 and it's a year where I've set myself up to start so many projects. For whatever reasons (i.e. a lack of time, lack of belief in myself, the first steps I've made are only the beginning in a very long term project, etc.), I know that there are still a lot of unfinished projects that I want to see finished. So, it's my good intentions to follow through on as many of these projects and finish them or get the projects to the next level. It's time to follow through on what I've started and the momentum I've built so far.

I know it's going to take a lot of focus, concentration, and hard work, but I know I can do it. I just have to keep myself accountable or figure out a way to motivate myself even more than before. I think just knowing that I will be using this word to guide me in 2020 it already a good step.

I hope you are doing well. Did you make resolutions for 2020 or do you have a guiding word? Care to share?

The Little Things

I don't innately forget, but it is good to be reminded that the important things in life are all about the little things. For me, it's trying to be present with my children, appreciating all that I have, and finding contentment in the moments that are easily dismissed and forgotten.

 

Noticing the snow falling on the last of the roses.

I have a dear friend with ALS. She's been bed-ridden for the last two years, if not longer, in a facility. I try to go see her once a month. I saw her yesterday and I'm reminded again that it's the little things in life that I need to be grateful for. She's surrounded by caring people and lots of good vibes. I love her and only wish the best for her, especially considering her condition. At the same time, I came home feeling so blessed and loved.

Seeing this beautiful winter sunrise.

I am grateful to feel the sun on my skin, the breeze in my hair, the touch from my children and husband's kisses and hugs, having the ability to be mobile, having independence, and so much more. I'm really happy with my life and what I have. I'm truly blessed and loved. And I'm glad that I can appreciate it.

Watching my children enjoy newly fallen snow.

So for today, I just wanted to pass along the message that you slow down, be present, and appreciate all the little things in your life. I hope you have a great day.

What little things and moments are you grateful for?

Potty Training: Update of my Oldest

I'd written an update back in January of this year regarding the potty training of my oldest. I'm glad to finally report that as of the last two weeks, I can say that he's 90% potty trained. He doesn't know how to wipe his behind (his little short arms barely reach his bottom), but he knows how to run to the toilet when he has to pee or poop. I'm so glad I didn't give up on him.

I had almost given up on him and his potty training. I'm telling you, this kid didn't mind if he soiled himself. He could sit for hours in his dirty pants, underwear, or diaper. Some parents online had said that they gave up and only started potty training again when their child showed interest, but my oldest didn't seem to show any interest. Really, he'd rather play than take time to go to the potty. Despite pulling my hair out and frustrated that he didn't want to potty train, I felt that if I gave up then I'd have wasted all of my time trying to potty train. I knew that my son knew how to go to the potty but he was lazy. So, I kept at the potty training.

Then last month, when the weather turned really cold, we found a hand-me-down fuzzy pajama pants and gave it to him to wear. He loves those pants. He lives in those pants and would never change out of them unless we made him. Well, after several pee and poop incidents that deprived him of his pants (because it needed to be washed when he had his "accidents") he realized that he needed to pee and poop in the potty in order keep wearing his pants. That pair of pants are a God-send. I'm just so happy that they were the motivation he needed to finally potty train.

Now it's on to the butt wiping stage, but I feel as if I've already crossed the hardest part of potty training. Onward and forward we go.

Do you have any potty training tips, especially for little boys?

The Dark Hedges

Northern Ireland, Taken on September 2019

Embracing Motherhood

I was reading a book this morning and in it the main character talks about how her mother embraced motherhood, it was her mother's purpose in life. This nugget of a thought stopped me in my tracks. I wondered to myself, have I embraced motherhood? To be honest, probably not. Maybe I should.

I don't know if the very act of having children and raising them is me embracing motherhood. I love my children and they both are at a fun age where everything is still knew to them. At the same time, I'm also wanting to travel and hike, which is hard for them to do for a long enough time at their young age. I do long for the days of alone time and quiet time spent reflecting and writing. And maybe, these longings and my stay at home isn't exactly me enjoying motherhood.

I told myself that I would embrace motherhood. I don't know what that means. I don't know if I should enjoy potty training more. I do know that I need to be more present with them. I probably need to be more grateful for this precious time that I have with them. They both are already getting so big and independent. I do know that I miss them when they are gone and they miss me when I'm gone.

If you have any suggestions for me about embracing motherhood or even parenthood, let me know. 

My Boys

Tuesday's Tune: Ocean Eyes

I heard this song sometime last year and meant to blog about it, but I didn't have as much time then. I was so intrigued not only by the singer's voice but also the lyrics. Can you believe that the singer first sang this song when she was thirteen years old and probably recorded the song at that age (or at fourteen years of age)? I think she may be turning eighteen this year (talk about using her time wisely and being productive).

When I heard this song, I immediately thought of my sons and their beautiful eyes. Especially when they were newborns. I remember looking deep into their ocean eyes (although, now that I think about it, I should've done it more), with deep unending knowledge and seeing galaxies in their eyes. I remember it was painful to keep staring into their eyes because there was so much unspoken knowledge and their memories of their spiritual world was still so fresh in their minds. As much as I bemoaned about having to care for my children as babies (e.g. not enough sleep, poopie diapers, throw-up), I miss those days of just being able to hold them in my arms. 

What comes to your mind when you listen to this song?

Mother's Day

When my children's father asked me what I wanted for Mother's Day, I immediately told him my plans, which intentionally didn't include them. There was no hesitation and no contemplation. I just needed a break from the three of them. Of course, I might go out to lunch with them, but I need time away (I'm with my boys for practically most days).  

Then last night, while coughing, I pulled a muscle on my right side. It hurt and it also hurts to breathe deeply. So, my Mother's Day plans had to be changed. I didn't get to do all that I had planned, but I got a little alone time. Of course, I spent most of my day with my boys. It wasn't a bad day and I very much enjoyed their company. Don't get me wrong, I love my Mr. Man and our boys. Sometimes, I just need a break.

I hope you had a great Mother's Day. Sending much love, light, and laughter to you.

Lessons Learned

Last month I took my little family back to California so that my siblings and I could throw a party for my father (he turned 65 years old). There were hiccups as we counted down the days to my father's party, but we as a whole survived the event.

The party didn't go according to plan, but it turned out fine. One thing that became so obvious during the party was that so many of the Hmong people we invited, who are of the same clan but not immediate family members, didn't show up. My father was quite devastated that they didn't come. Yet, what was very interesting was the fact that a lot of my parents non-Hmong friends did show up. These people were friends that my parents had made in the last several years who cared enough to come to a birthday party held on a Saturday night, specifically for my father. It was quite moving, to be honest. I think it really opened up my parents' eyes that those that cared for them don't have to be Hmong.

We have to plan another birthday party for my mom in a couple of years, but we've learned so much from my dad's party. Hopefully, we will survive that one too. Hopefully, my parents will be open to inviting all of their friends again, regardless if they are Hmong or not.