"We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them."---Khalil Gibran
I think about some of the choices I've made in my life and the paths that I've taken. Sometimes I think I've made the decisions I made because it was the "right" decision to make at the time, regardless of what my emotions were at the time.
I think about the time when I came to Minnesota for school. At the time, I didn't realize that I was already choosing my joys and sorrows. I made my decision to come to school in Minnesota because I really wanted to go to school and the university in Minnesota was the only school that accepted me (I applied to at least ten other schools in various states). I don't think happiness or sadness played a part in my decision. My decision was very matter-of-fact and, as I just stated, because this university was the only one that accepted me and I didn't want to put off my education any further.
Of course, I was cognizant of some of the joys and sorrows that would occur, but it's only after coming here did I experience the joys and sorrows of my decision. I was so happy to be able to further my schooling and career, to be able to graduate from the university, and to have met so many wonderful people. Yet, the sorrows I encountered were loneliness, the dang Minnesota cold, and knowledge that I've missed out so much of my family (e.g. seeing my younger brothers grow up, not celebrating holidays/birthdays with my nieces and nephews, just not having the presence of my parents). Even now, I don't know if it's a joy or a sorrow to continue to live in Minnesota. I guess, life happens.
I think about the time when I came to Minnesota for school. At the time, I didn't realize that I was already choosing my joys and sorrows. I made my decision to come to school in Minnesota because I really wanted to go to school and the university in Minnesota was the only school that accepted me (I applied to at least ten other schools in various states). I don't think happiness or sadness played a part in my decision. My decision was very matter-of-fact and, as I just stated, because this university was the only one that accepted me and I didn't want to put off my education any further.
Of course, I was cognizant of some of the joys and sorrows that would occur, but it's only after coming here did I experience the joys and sorrows of my decision. I was so happy to be able to further my schooling and career, to be able to graduate from the university, and to have met so many wonderful people. Yet, the sorrows I encountered were loneliness, the dang Minnesota cold, and knowledge that I've missed out so much of my family (e.g. seeing my younger brothers grow up, not celebrating holidays/birthdays with my nieces and nephews, just not having the presence of my parents). Even now, I don't know if it's a joy or a sorrow to continue to live in Minnesota. I guess, life happens.
What joy and sorrow did you choose before you even were able to experience these emotions?
3 comments:
You know neng. I believe you made the right choice and you have set the bar. I really want to achieve something at your level or higher. I want to surpass you. It is still hard for me to decide what. Want in life. But I really want to be in your class. Neng. What you did was awesome. I will be up there with you one day.
Thanks Mein. Right now, I have no regrets about the path I've taken in my life (life is too short for regrets). Yet, with this path, there have been a lot of happiness and sorrows. Sometimes, I wonder if the happiness and sorrows have balanced each other out, or if one out weights the other.
I know you will get to your destination soon. You just have to make a decision and stick with it. I have a lot of faith in you.
Thank you neng.
Post a Comment