Remembering Kaus Vwj

Dia de los Muertos (in English it translate to "Day of the Dead") is usually celebrated on November 1st and/or November 2nd (you can read more about this holiday at the following website: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Day_of_the_Dead). It's a holiday often celebrated in Mexico, in which many gather together to celebrate and remember those that have passed. It's considered a very joyous holiday.

I'm a little bit late in celebrating Dia de los Muertos. I'm very sorry. Yet, at the same time, I don't think it's ever too late to celebrate and remember those that have already passed. So, for today, I will share and remember my brother in my own way. This is will be the first time I have ever written anything about my brother. I also hope that if any of my siblings get a chance to read this post, they too will reflect back on our brother.

As some of you may know, my brother took his own life several years ago. I think that the way he ended his life was very violent, yet at the same time it indicated how much he did not want to be a part of this world. He was so young (and many would say that he was quite handsome). In retrospect, I can only speculate as to why he took his life. I have always loved my brother. As he grew older, I found it harder to love my brother, but I continued to love him. I can truthfully say that I did not like my brother as an adult because I found him to be very difficult, and "difficult" is an understatement. Yet, I can truthfully say that I loved him.

My brother passed away during the summer, right when I was to return to graduate school. When I returned to school, I was far away from my family and didn't have any immediate family members near me. I had a pretty hard time, emotionally and spiritually, readjusting to school. To say the very least, I was very very sad. I then came across this quilting book, Come Listen to my Quilt by Kristina Becker. It really inspired me to channel my sadness about my brother into a quilted wall hanging. I finally finished my wall hanging earlier in the year and overall I found the process to be very cathartic. It contains many symbols and has lots of meaning. When I look at it, it doesn't make me sad, but reminds me of my brother and my family. My brother's death does remind me that I really need to tell those who are here that I love them a lot (not just think it) and to spend as much of my time with them.

Hope you spend your own time, loving not only those who have passed but also those that are still here with you.